My wife and I have been foster parents for the last few years. We have had foster children that lived with us for a time and now are reunited with their birth family. However, the current set of children (one of each) were sent to us with express intent of adoption. We hope and pray this will come to pass so we can start a family with them.
This brings me to or current quandary.
Our foster son does not listen to my wife. In fact, he does not accept female authority well. It’s quite a challenge to my wife as she is quiet and calm by nature. The prospect of disciplining a child and even raising her voice or putting them in “time out” is hard for her.
My advice was simple. “No matter what you are doing, where you are at or who is present, let him know you are in charge and he has to listen. Even if it gets ugly, no other parent will be surprised or look down on you. They’ve been there themselves.”
I reminded her of Paul’s similar sentiment when faced with his actions in light of God’s plan. He did what he did not want and yet, God loved him. He was happy that God had created rules and borders for his life. Now, he could live comfortably and peacefully knowing his actions would be acceptable to God.
I reminded my wife that one day our son would look back and thank her for the hard work of teaching him right and wrong, all while loving him more than he could ask or imagine.
[Update] Well, things are still going along slowly. One day good, part of one day bad. We love them to pieces.
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